weddingsv make me drug and hornr
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
