I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Randomize
