I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
smell my finger.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
