Kiss
Puke
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
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