That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize