Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
