you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Randomize
