I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
You're like the curious george of whores
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
