Your tits are I can't wait for
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
