im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
