is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Randomize
