I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Plan B is the new Plan A
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
