he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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