Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
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