I don't think brook has ever known best
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
