No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
