I want you more than these girls want KFC
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Randomize