Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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