I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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