You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
