problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
