tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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