Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
