I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
