Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize