goodnight i made you a song goodbye
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
You smell like stripper and shame
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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