new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize