My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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