"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Randomize
