so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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