haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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