I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize