Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
She's the barista slut.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
