a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
