He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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