Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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