How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
