What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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