I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
only if we run a train.
done.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize