As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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