More tranny stories later!
there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
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