Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
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