apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Randomize
