Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
