Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize