i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
