he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Everclear isn't food dammit
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
