Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize