I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
