do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
